Dear Lucerne Dairy Products,
I am writing about your product naming abomination – the “Mexican” four cheese blend. This bag of shredded cheese you offer is nothing short of an insult, and I feel it is my duty to inform you that nothing about the contents of this bag have any correlation to Mexico.
This blend consists of the following cheeses: Cheddar, Mozzarella, Colby, and Monterey. To further break this down let’s refresh ourselves on cheese-making history. You’re sixth grade grasp of geography will come in handy.